Rabiz, Aziz Jan!

The cultural phenomena in Armenia, which is known as Rabiz, has been very influential in my stylistic and materialistic growth. Okay so maybe it hasn't, but it is very easy to distinguish this special kind of Armenian from others. The word Rabiz itself originated from two Russian words meaning "without class". Self-explanatory, I would assume. My observations are in no way generalizing Armenians as a whole, because every country has its 'special' kind of people. Hayastancis, don't take offense - I know you have your own stereotypes about Diasporan Armenians, which are probably true.

The song that Seto & I have written touches on some of the crucial aspects of Rabizology. However, for those who do not yet understand the Hayastanci culture, I'll outline some basic principles in English.

Rabiz male
1. Black clothing from top to bottom
2. Matching sweatsuit with pointy leather shoes
3. Obvious fake designer clothing with matching colored pants
4. Wears sunglasses regardless of weather or time of day
5. Squats, spits seeds, and smokes cigarettes ---> see photo
6. Speaks an unintelligible form of Armenian

The squat, which is surprisingly comfortable

Rabiz females are harder to describe because they aren't as prevalent, but our song touches on the highlights (no, not in the bleached out hair).

Երեւանի Ռապիզերի

To the tune of "Yerevani Axchiknerin" by Tata Simonyan

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WD5Cvx_UFlA 

Seto Hovsepian & Ani Tramblian

Երեւանի Ռապիզնէրի, Երեւանի Ռապիզնէրի (Yerevan Rabizians, Yerevan Rabizians)

Շատ գեղեձիկ կը հագնին, Երեւանի Ռապիզները (They dress so classy, Yerevan rabizians)

Տղաքը կը հագնինշ գույնզգույն տաբատներ, (The men wear colorful pants)

Կարմիր կապույտ եւ դեղին, սուր եւ փայլուն կօշիկներ (Red, blue, and yellow, pointy and shiny shoes)

Թեւ-թեւի անոնք կ՛անձնին, աղջիկները կը դիտեն. ( Arm and arm, they go by, watching the girls)

Գետինը կը պպզին, սիկարեդներ կը ծխեն (Squatting on the ground, smoking cigarettes)

Գետինը կը պպզին, սիկարեդներ կը ծխեն (Squatting on the ground, smoking cigarettes)

Երեւանի Ռապիզնէրի, Երեւանի Ռապիզնէրի (Yerevan Rabizians, Yerevan Rabizians)

Շատ գեղեձիկ կը հագնին, Երեւանի Ռապիզները (They dress so class, Yerevan rabizians)

Աղջիկները կը հագնին, բարձրկռունկ կօշիկներ (The girls always wear high-heeled shoes)

Հարսի հագուստներով, կ՛երդան համալսարաններ (They dress like brides to go to university)

Հինկին առտու կ՛արդննան, հայելիին դեմ կը նստին (They wake up and 5am and sit in front of the mirror)

Երեսները կը ներկեն, ինչ է որ ռապիզ ելեն (To paint their faces so it comes out Rabiz)

Երեսները կը ներկեն, ինչ է որ ռապիզ ելեն (To paint their faces to it comes out Rabiz)

Երեւանի Ռապիզնէրի, Երեւանի Ռապիզնէրի (Yerevan Rabizians, Yerevan Rabizians)

Շատ գեղեձիկ կը հագնին, Երեւանի Ռապիզները (They dress so classy, Yerevan Rabizians)

Ռապիզ բարը լըսեցի, երբ ես Երեւան եկա (I heard Rabiz slang, when I came to Yerevan)

Ռապիզ երգը լըսեցի, երբ մարշրուտկաներ ելա (I heard Rabiz songs, when I rode the marshrutka)

Ինծմէ մի նեղուիք երբեք ես ալ հայ եմ ձեզի պես (Don't get mad at me, I'm Armenian just like you)

Ռապիզ եւ վոչ ռապիզ, բոլորս ալ հայեր էնք (Rabiz and non-Rabiz, we are all Armenian)

Ռապիզ եւ վոչ ռապիզ, բոլորս ալ հայեր էնք! (Rabiz and non-Rabiz, we are all Armenian)

Երեւանի Ռապիզնէրի, Երեւանի Ռապիզնէրի (Yerevan Rabizians, Yerevan Rabizians)

Շատ գեղեձիկ կը հագնին, Երեւանի Ռապիզները (They dress so classy, Yerevan Rabizians)

So much bread!

This week wasn’t overly exciting. I woke up on Wednesday morning to see that America re-elected the great promise-breaker. We all saw it coming but I am truly saddened that we will have to deal with Obama’s incompetence again. As a self-driven conservative, liberalism goes against every grain in my body. In other news, I am volunteering at Repat Armenia as an English language editor and semi-journalist. 

Haters gonna hate.

It is about time I wrote a post about food. I wrote a similar style blog while I was abroad in Dortmund, Germany in which I explained my dietary choices and mishaps. This experience is entirely different, perhaps because I already know what adjusting to another country’s dietary customs is like. I can sum up the diet in a few words - BREAD & BREAD; but I'll explain something other than BREAD if you continue to read.

Nakhajash, or breakfast, is something pretty basic for me. I am a huge advocate of yogurt, which I eat every day. At first, I would only buy the German products because I trust their quality more than Russian things. I like to eat fruit at breakfast which varies depending on what my host family brought back from the village in Vanadzor. There are usually apples and peaches around, and last week my host brother brought back clementines from Georgia. Coffee is quite different here. I love Armenian coffee, which is served in small coffee cups. It tastes great but the serving size is quite small so it doesn’t completely satisfy my desire for a warm beverage in the morning. Therefore, I must resort to instant coffee, which seems to be the norm around here anyways. I haven’t even seen a drip coffee machine around so I don’t think it’s a thing in Armenia. Instant coffee is nasty compared to fresh brewed American or German style coffee, but I don’t really have a choice.

Snack time! Bonchik is Armenia’s donut. At Grand Candy, Armenia’s widely known candy company, one ‘bonchik’ costs 80 dram (about 20 cents). A bonchik is a fried dough blob that is filled with a kind of cream. It sounds like a donut, but is better because it is always served fresh – piping hot fried goodness. Unfortunately napkins in Armenia are even worse than in Germany. Bonchiks are served with a wax paper napkin. As if a slip of wax paper is going to get the grease and powdered sugar off of my mouth and fingers…!

Ponchik-monchik!

Lunch time is usually around 1pm or later because work generally starts at 10am (as opposed to 9am like in the US/Germany). My work schedule varies from day to day so lunch is always a surprise for me as well. Some days I will go to the supermarket during my break to get some sarma and tabouleh. The sarma at the local ‘STAR’ supermarket is pretty good. Tabouleh is way better at Nana’s house. I really miss the Lebanese/Armenian food we eat at home like zatar, hummus, feti, labneh, and tabouleh. If I’m wanting to eat something more starchy I’ll get a Khachapuri. Khachapuri is a triangle shaped bread thingy filled with cheese. Sometimes the dough is flaky, sometimes it is soft. The kids at school go bonkers for this stuff.

Armenians pride themselves on two things (not including khorovats): lavash bread and dolma. Lavash bread is a traditional flatbread that can be eaten with every meal. You can of course find loaves of bread everywhere, but they sell rolls of lavash as well. I can eat everything with lavash but my favorite is trusty Nutella. Be careful though, because lavash dries out quickly and becomes unappetizing. Everyone’s mother can make dolma better than the next person’s. Dolma is a traditional dish that consists of a hollowed out vegetable (squash, bell pepper, cabbage) that is filled with rice, meat, and spices. I don’t like to eat much meat in general so I’ll pass on the khorovats.

One of my favorite oddities spotted so far is the connection between Costco’s Kirkland brand and the SAS supermarket chain in Armenia. Kirkland is Costco’s own brand so its products are high quality at a low cost. My family loves the Costco wholesale stores in the states so  the first time I saw the Kirkland sign in Armenia I had a huge smile on my face. No, they don’t give free samples here (sorry Hirig). I tried to take a picture of the glorious KIRKLAND sign in the SAS supermarket but I got yelled at by an employee who told me I wasn’t allowed to take pictures inside. Stupid soviet mentality is still highly visible in certain aspects. 

Dolma - stuffed peppers, grape leaves, etc.

Fruits and vegetables here are fantastic. They don’t use pesticides and pomegranates really do grow everywhere. There is pretty much the same variety as in the US, but strawberries are really expensive and I haven’t seen a pineapple in a while. Armenians like their persimmons, apricots, plums, and figs (which are even better dried)!  And fruits are sold everywhere. On the side of the road, in 'fresh fruit' markets, and in...soviet cars!

Pomegranate Lada - thanks, https://www.facebook.com/TarverdiPhotography

As winter rolls around, the prices for fruits and veggies will skyrocket so the alternative is homemade fruit and veggie preserves. If you have any questions, please feel free to comment! I have a feeling I will become good friends with potatoes by the end of this year…

Visited Sanahin and Haghpat over the weekend in the Lori province. Far drive, not so exciting. 

Անի

Only in Armenia do we travel to various borders to see our own historical tourist attractions. We have to cross through backland Azerbaijan to visit our Artsakh, or our Nakhichevan. This time it was for me; we went to see the city of Ani. Historically known as the City of 1001 Churches, a city that once rivaled with Constantinople, the Christian capital of the Middle East now stands in ruins. Although an earthquake rocked the region and destroyed many of the monuments, it was the Turkish government that finished the job, by ordering its officers in the region to destroy all evidence of Christian Armenian existence. 

Look, you can see bits of the wall.

Once we approached the buffer zone between Armenia and Turkey, we had to switch to a different bus. The ‘road’ to the actual border was not exactly in great condition and our bus wasn’t going to exert itself to make it to the end. The border bus was quite the experience. The floor was covered in diesel fuel and the windows were mostly nailed shut. Oh yeah, and the driver was smoking...All of the Gamavors crammed into it, which resulted in marshrutka like chaos. A good stomach churning 20 minutes later, we reached the final border point. It was the edge of a cliff that led to the river, which separates Armenia and Turkey today. I had a feeling that visiting the city I was named after would be an emotional trip. 

Simon, Melissa, Armen & I enjoying the gasoline marshrutka

We got off the bus and walked past the border patrol to reach the viewpoint. Initially I was in such a shock, I didn’t move; I just gazed into the ruins. From that point, I could see some of the city’s walls that were still intact. I could see the remnants of many ancient churches. And there was one church that was still in good condition. As I sat on a rock, tears flowing down my cheeks, I imagined my Ani with full-fledged wings, a bustling metropolis in Western Armenia. Of course I was angry that it isn’t recognized as part of Armenia. However, I now know why I was named after this city. God blessed Ani with history of Christianity, and even though it was conquered 1000 years ago, it still stands today as a symbol of Armenians and their will to keep fighting, to never give up.

Me & my Ani

We had a picnic in a village also along the border. I should clarify – there are several kinds of ‘bathrooms’ in Armenia. There is your standard, European/American toilet with sandpaper toilet paper. There is your ‘arabgan’ (Arab) toilet, a hole in the ground with a small platform where one is to squat to relieve him or herself.  And there’s my personal favorite, au natural, or outdoors. The picnic spot was an extremely flat piece of land. Guys didn’t have much of a problem. They could just walk away far enough and do their business across the fence and into Turkey. It was a bit more difficult for women. I walked towards the train tracks, which I thought were abandoned. I was about to unzi…oh shoot, there’s a family in that house across the tracks. I walked for another good 10 minutes when I finally decided I just wanted to go and get back to lunch. Luckily there was an abandoned hut where I left a surprise for whoever comes in next. Word of wisdom – always carry tissues and hand sanitizer. 

We made it to Gyumri in the evening, where we endured a fascinating (…) tour of Gyumri’s history museum. Okay, so Gyumri was ravaged by the earthquake that rocked the region in 1988. The destruction was still visible, as many structures still lay in ruins. The Gyumretsis, on the other hand, are some of the most amazing people I’ve ever met. They speak a different dialect of Armenian, which is actually closer to Western Armenian. We were staying for less than 12 hours with our host families. However, it took about only an hour to make a connection with them that I know I will never forget. Gyumretsis like humor. I explained the marshrutka song, and the interesting dialect of Yerevanci men, to which we all started laughing. They especially enjoyed the grunt – this would be too much to explain, you’ll just have to visit and hear for yourself. This family told me that I’m not a Yerevanci, I’m a Gyumretsi at heart. I’m pretty sure they’re right!

Seto & I enjoying a Gyumri evening

On Sunday, November 4^th, we visited a children’s orphanage in Gyumri. Many of the children lost their parents during the earthquake or the war and now live in the center. I really loved playing with them, especially doing some acrobatic tricks with Evelyn! It was touching when they held hands and stood in front of the gate to block our bus from leaving. Our driver wasn’t exactly a charmer and just honked at them until they moved…

Church in Gyumri. Awesome!

Աշուն

In memory of my parakeet, Havgeet, who just passed away after 6 glorious years living with her buddy, Juteek.

Sireli blog untertzoghner (readers),

Happy November. The end of October was full of fun excursions, strange occurrences and lots of gata. It has gotten much colder here, and as Armenians like to believe in old wives’ tales, I am collecting plenty of them. For example, today on my ride to school, one of the teachers asked if I am cold. I said yes, that I was cold. Her response? “You need to stay here and marry an Armenian man so you can warm up. You know, that’s why they have the big bellies – they need to stay warm!” My gut reaction was no, and I made that evident through my skeptical facial expressions. She responded “what, you don’t like Armenian men? You don’t want to marry an Armenian?” I had to explain that I don’t think of marriage as something that happens because it needs to. This isn’t the last story about marriage in this blog entry. 

Stampeding ducks!

Our last excursion was to Dilijan, a beautiful region of Armenia in the north.  We visited Parz Lij, a picturesque lake. There were lots of ducks and geese swimming around in the water, and they started coming towards us as we got off the bus. I had my Russian cracker biscuits in hand, ready to feed the swarms! They are surprisingly aggressive, not like the ducks in the Aflac commercials. I wanted to hand feed them, but those duck bills pack a powerful punch. I finished the crackers and was followed back to the bus by a gaggle of geese waiting for more food. What can I say, I’m a bird lady! The Parz Lij property also had a nice café and paddleboats…and a dilapidated marshrutka. The lake itself was surrounded by the majestic colors of autumn. The more we travel outside Yerevan, the more I love Armenia; however, I don’t know if I could live in a village long term. 

Our next stop was a monastery, Haghardzin – I hate to be a spoilsport, but I’m all monasteried-out. For me, it’s me it’s more about what is around the monastery rather than the building itself. There was this really awesome thousand year old tree with a hole in it. The mystical prophecies behind this tree vary, but all of them involve wiggling one’s way through the hole in the tree. There was a group of locals attempting to slide through the tree in their fancy church clothes and expected stilettos. I thought everyone in their group had finished, so of course I laid down in the tree and quickly slithered through. When my head popped out on the other side, I was facing the sky and about 9 Armenian women staring at me. They were as confused as I was – they were expecting one of their group members, not a eccentric spyurkahye. However, they told me that due to my agile and swift performance, I will be married within the year and have a baby boy. That was marriage story # 2. 

Hole-y tree

While the group took a tour through the monastery, Evelyn and I decided to lay out on one of the rock walls, which quickly turned into a stretching session. I didn’t realize it, but we were being watched by a group of young Armenian men who looked confused and impressed by our goofy stretchiness.

When we got back to Yerevan, 6 of us were walking through Republic Square to find something to eat. The fountains started their daily routine of music and water, and the hit song “Cotton Eye Joe” started to play. American ears perked up of course, and we started to square dance. It turned into indescribable silliness when we all started dancing to whatever music was playing. I’m just glad we could entertain the somber locals sitting nearby. Something like this happened again, while Evelyn and I were doing yoga/acrobatics at Mashdots Park. We were practicing some stunts and many children came up to watch us and ask what we are doing. The Norwegian Ambassador to Armenia even wrote in a Facebook post that Mashdots Park reminded him of Norway because there were ‘people on all the benches, and even two young girls practicing yoga’. 

Wednesday was Halloween. Unknown to many Armenians (or cursed upon because it is a Devil’s holiday apparently), Halloween made a casual appearance in downtown Yerevan. Sitting with Simon and Vartan, we randomly came up with the idea to give candy out to kids dressed up in costumes on Northern Ave, because we were told that there were a good number of costumed kids there. Luckily Simon had a pirate hat and eye patch, and I was wearing black and white which matched. Simon was the videographer while I worked on my best pirate ARRRRR and sauntered up and down Northern Ave. I though saying ‘Pari Halloween’ sounded stupid, so I stuck with ‘Happy Halloween!’, as I approached cute kids dressed up as witches, ghouls, or animals. Most of them were confused; someone was giving out candy without expecting anything in return? What language was she speaking anyways? Arrrr? Like take the candy? I think I was asked like 5 times to take pictures with kids. I was having a blast being a goofball and spreading joy and a taste of American culture to Armenia. People were so curious as to where we were from, so it was really fun to mess with them and be even more mysterious. Oh yeah, and I was stared at in the There should be a video compilation coming soon. 

Only the beginning.

This weekend: trip to the border to see the ruins of Ani from afar and then a one night stay in Gyumri. Also, graduate applications sent to UVA, Penn State, Rutgers, and UCLA!